IF you think that smell your idols sparkling underarm or taste her sweaty armpit is impossible, well, think again!

I recognized one old trick was practiced by a boy in 2007 American Idol's audition. On that audition room, he declared as Paula huge fans. I assume you know Paula Abdul, the singer, the pretty jury. Not because she's the only female of the three, but she's certainly pretty. Although she's not young anymore.

The boy failed to gain a ticket to Hollywood, but still got the prize. Paula wish for embracing her fans before he went home. But just when she opened her arms wide apart to hug, look what the boy's doing. He put his nose directly (and cleverly) to Paula's right armpit! So it was too late for Paula to close her arm. The boy sucked it for secs long, then smiled in satisfaction. She smiled back. Happy ending. But since that, I so rarely saw Paula wear sleeveless on Idol. ^_^

What a strategy! Direct and simple. But worth. At least, for him and me. Maybe you ask, "What if I missed? What if I don't react as quick as that boy? What if I too late to placed my face?"

Improve, then. Using hands, for example. This is what I call Indirect Method. Squeezing her sweaty armpit skin while we're in embrace. It works easily only when her body smaller than yours. Smear up your hand (usually just one hand that could reach the right spot) with the damp. After that, you may sniff, lick or whatever you want, the traces of sweat on your hand. But I recommended not to do that while she's still around.

And one thing! Don't go too much. Squeezing must elegantly, smoothly, as normal as what ordinary people do in embracing. Because if you can't control your hands, the artist will feel tickled, uncomfortable, so she spontaneously pull back.

When it happens, it's your loss! Not just shorten the period of your ecstasy, she can also shout, "Fucking freaks!" to you. If you can gently say, "Yes, I am!" it doesn't matter. But I won't like you, then. :P

I used to practice Indirect Method in music concert. Like rock, hip hop, or whatever required uncertainty to what happens next (not typical Enya or Il Divo concert). Usually, the singer come join audience, in the middle of the band performance. So she can physically greeting her fans, and the fans can touch her. She, I guarantee, doesn't objected to be touched in this kind of circumstance. You know where your hand should go.

But don't do anything when she's still on the stage, even if she's squatting close to you. In your position, you can't reach target without being notice by everyone (and cameras). If you extend your hands to her, she'll think you just want hand contact like others. What you're gonna do? Grab her? Pull her closer to you? Go ahead. And face the guards soon after. ^_^

Me? I wait patiently until she steps down. What if she doesn't? Well, consider it's not my lucky day.

Right moment is precisely when there are many hands struggling to reach her, so yours can run "invisible". When somebody pull her arms, it's your chance. When somebody shake her hand, it's your chance. When somebody raise her hands, it's your chance. When she's waving to audience far behind, it's also your chance. Carpe diem!

Absolutely up to you whether you use Direct or Indirect Method. But once again, do it elegantly. Act like you are ordinary fans who's desperately touch her.

The situation sometimes run chaos. But it's not bad news at all. A year ago, in local concert of a solo artist, I was so fortunate. Near the end of concert, the sleeveless dress dazzling singer slipped and fell just in front of me. I helped her in no time. I lifted her by, of course, her underarms.

From the distance, she was so cool and calm, I couldn't see her perspiration either. But the fact, yes, she was very sweaty, particularly in her armpits. Very sweaty armpits! Oh, God. I felt burning inside both of my hands. Anyway, it's Indirect Method!

She was laughing. Not because feeling tickled. More because of her own sloppy act. I thought she didn't want to stand for a moment, so I put her back on the floor. But another man then tried to help her too. No way, I didn't want to lose it. Thus I quickly managed to help her to stand with another way: Put her left arm around my neck, until my nose and her sweaty armpit just an inch or so. And when I decided to turn my head, my nose simply touched it. It's Direct Method, my friends!

How did that sweaty armpit smell? I'm not quite sure. Like butter mixed by cheese. But most strongly was the scent of deodorant. I hate deodorant. The fake! But, that's another story.

For now, you've just see how possible to sniff your idol's armpits. But if you know any new method, please, share it with sweaty armpit enthusiasts all over the planet. Yeah. Right here!

denny hsp

[back to head]

ACTUALLY, the strongest aroma of woman is not at her axilla, even if it's so sweaty armpit ever! But simply at genital area. The pits become interesting because seldom any disease would hide out there, as long as she take good care of it.

Denny has showed his experiences about sniffing. He's a dog in reality (hahahaha, kidding, Den). Here I just want to fit out his article. No matter whom is gonna your target, star or someone in your everyday life, remember these:

One, make sure your hands clean and odorless before, even from lotion or perfume. If not, it will cause confusion on your smelling system.

Two, never lick or wet kiss her sweaty armpit in any way. Once you do that, forget about the pure aroma. Your saliva plus her perspiration, they bring funny whiff.

Three, try also to provoke her (if you know each other well) not to wear any deodorant, even (mainly) on summer.

I put into practice those three to my girlfriend, and guess what, my nose grows expert! I can distinguish many kind of sweaty armpits. Whether is cold sweat (when she was nervous), hot sweat (after she worked out), et cetera. But that's another story. Isn't it, Den?

marn hsp

[back to head]